The pastor was speaking of Jesus……
He spoke of His virtues, of His greatness.
Then he chastised the congregation….
He asked “How many of you truly know Him?”
“If Jesus were to appear before you today, how many of you could truly say that you know Him personally and that you have a relationship with Him?”
At first I was despondent, feeling unworthy….that I had not devoted enough of my life and my thoughts to Him.
Then I started to think about Him…..did I really “know” Him?
Immediately I thought “Jesus is love”. And I have known love.
I looked to my left at the man standing in prayer at my side. I thought about our love and what it had created. That led me to think of our one year old daughter in the nursery, who loved coming to church, had “danced” to the music every Sunday while still in my womb and would now dance around the living room to Jars of Clay, Michael W. Smith and Phillips, Craig & Dean.
Then I thought of my parents. How they had loved me and raised me. That they had sacrificed for myself and my two sisters and made sure that we knew the true meaning of selfless love. I thought of my grandparents….how one had raised a son as a single, unwed mother in the 1930s and had shown nothing but love and acceptance to her grandchildren. How the other two had raised a son and two daughters on an egg farmer’s income and taught me the true meaning of compassion. I thought of how my maternal grandmother’s words had shaped the person that I had become – I had been voicing my teenage opinion about a public figure and declaring that I hated him. She very gently informed me that I did not know him well enough to hate him. Words that have returned to me time and time again when I have rushed to judge another person.
JESUS IS LOVE
I HAVE KNOWN LOVE
It was at that very moment, as I was remembering my grandmother, that I suddenly became aware that something had changed. As I sank to the floor, unable to stand, I realized that I was no longer with the congregation. I was in a place of blessings……and as the tears started to flow I saw a most wondrous light. It was so brilliant that I should not have been able to look at it, yet I could. I saw a figure, clothed in a blue/white light walking towards me. As He got to me, He raised me off my knees and enveloped me in His arms. I experienced the most pure, unselfish feeling of love that I had ever felt before and have not felt since. Just as suddenly, I found myself back with the congregation. I wanted to run around the room shouting “He’s here! He’s here!” but I couldn’t move. On my knees I realized that the rest of the room had not seen Him. This was His gift to me and me alone.
As the years have passed, through each earthly trial or disappointment, I have remembered this day. As loved ones have passed on, I have had the comfort of knowing that He was waiting, arms extended, to welcome them home with love, compassion and acceptance.
The true meaning of the Christmas Season….the pure love of our Savior….these are the things that I hope to share with you now. It is the right time. Those of this world may think that I was delusional. They may think me brainwashed by the church-going masses or desperate to find a reason……
I know in my heart that Christ is Lord. He died for our sins and loves us unconditionally. And if I try my hardest, in my true heart, to love as He would love…..to treat my fellow human beings as He would want me to treat them, than whom have I harmed in my beliefs?
And who has benefitted?
May God bless you and yours.
Merry Christmas.